dir/new_school/rant: P h a t   P h a r m  

The funny thing is that I really wanted to write an article about every woman I see having a great ass.  Of course, writing a piece about how I lust over the recent fat asses of women would probably be taken wrong and it wouldn’t really approach the true situation and all the underlying issues. 

When you’re fat, you always want to lose weight, but your true goal is to not gain anymore weight.  Newly fat people have anxiety attacks, start to drink slim fast, buy pills and any snake oil gimmick, pitched by a celebrity they like and trust.  And the saddest thing is when you chat with them about it and they look and talk to you as if they have fat cancer, which they hope will go into remission…soon.

I am fat, it’s true, my mom will still mention that I am big boned, but really it’s fat, the bones are big…there is a lot of muscle, but still, also fat.  I accept it.  I fit a classic profile, I was an only child, with a single mother, I was a serious mommas boy growing up.  I didn’t take the tough exterior, of emulating my fathers machismo, until much later in life.  I’m also very funny, fat people are always funny, except, for those sad fat people.
      
The thing is that I am a traditional fat person, I grew up fat as a child, my mother even admits shoving anything in my mouth, whenever I cried and how that habit just kinda carried on to a healthy appetite; as a child growing up.  Of course I can’t blame my damn mother.  Actually I can, now is the time in our society where I can put all of my faults on someone.  But I knew I was fat even back then and as a matter of fact, while I am comfortable being fat, I always aspire to weigh less and as with many traditional fat people, my weight tends to fluctuate, from being fat to “Are you losing weight”.  

Every fat person aspires to hear those four words.  And on occasion you meet reformed fat people, who proudly show their pictures of fatdom and how they don’t live that life anymore. 

All fat people strive to be funny, rather then be the sad fat person though.  

You see the sad fat person a lot, they read by themselves at the buffet, always dress uncomfortably, enjoy sci fi and tv shows.  Fat, sad, lonely people are serious loners, usually being treated like disgusting pariah as children, they grow to mistrust people, mostly because they are treated like lepers who might pass on the dreaded fat disease. 
 
It’s kinda sad I guess, but fat people are usually well read and that is a consolation at least we’re usually smart right?

Interestingly enough, with all that bullshit aside.  I find it quite interesting that America has become fat overnight.  Just ask any other culture and it always starts with “Those FAT Lazy Americans” Which is ok.  Welcome to the shadowy world of being fat everybody. 
 
We watch as celebrities’ struggle back and forth with their weight.  We are inundated with advertisements that tell us how we can not only lose weight, but do it fast, with no hassle or change in lifestyle. 

I recently came to understand that all this targeted advertising is not meant for your traditional fat person.  It’s really not, the high revving motion of weight loss marketing is targeted at the “Newly Fat”.  

You might be able to trace the “newly fat” to the “new middle class”, which we saw birthed in the mid eighties and carried on to current times.  Of course there was a time when being fat was a sign of wealth and good living.  I lament for those times, when I coulda been one of those fat, jolly, mutton leg, eating guys, lusting after the gorgeous reubeneqsue babe, with their flush and heaving cleavage.  

Sadly no time machine… So I will try to control my desire to share my fantasies of being the jolly, stein drinking, headbusting nobleman. 

It is kinda curious though, while I am used to being fat and in my sense of saying this I accept it.  What I mean though is that I don’t have a low self-esteem, I think we always want to look more attractive then we are, whether we are thin or fat or just damn ugly.  It’s important to note though, that when you want to overcome something, you must first accept it, which might be the only relevant line you should leave with and remember about this piece. 

The Newly Fat are a sad lot though.  The profile of the newly fat are people who were never fat before.  They were fit and trim, their metabolisms always worked in their favor.  The Newly Fat are always shocked the day they realize they have gone from “adding pounds” to overweight.  I guess it’s disconcerting to go through life normal and then be one of the slow, fat weak ones in the herd.  

In the sense of attraction though, our culture has subtlety changed.  More and more for the benefit of all, attraction has become more intoned with style and I don’t mean couture fashion or name brand shit. We really are in a renaissance where “the look” has become accepted as a standard of attractiveness in the minds of many, save maybe the beautiful people. 

So the playing field is level folks, for the first time in many, many years.  While I The rules are simple, regardless of what shortcomings you believe you have, you have to accept them.  If you’re fat, be fat and be so bold and do your thing… 

See, on a side note, the piece isn’t about being fat or overcoming fat, it’s about looking at your life and believing in yourself.  I’m honestly concerned folks, way too many people I talk to are covered in adjectives that they use to identify themselves rather then honestly knowing themselves. 

I can’t say that there is a revolution in the process, with what society accepts or what is even a measure of acceptance, other then to say that we are sometimes our own betrayers, when we fall into allowing ourselves to be hung by words.  

So stand in front of the mirror naked and proudly look yourself in the eye for the first time, cause your ass doesn’t look so bad from over here.